7 Ways I Ground Myself to Reality
As someone who lives with a schizophrenia spectrum illness, grounding myself in reality can sometimes be very difficult.
My mind often times feels like it borders the edge of another reality, making it difficult to keep my focus on the reality that I’m supposed to be a part of.
Here are some of steps I take when I’m feeling on the edge or having intense dissociative symptoms to help feel in my body and a part of the present moment.
Dry brushing
Sometimes, when I’m feeling really dissociated, I need to find a way to ground myself physically. I sometimes feel so disconnected from myself and my environment that physical change is the only way to bring myself back to reality and become focused on grounding myself in the present moment.
If you’ve never heard of dry brushing, dry brushing is when you massage your body using a dry-stiff bristled brush. It is basically a form of exfoliating your body, except better, in my opinion.
When dry brushing, there’s a physical sensation on the skin that is hard to ignore. It can’t be described as painful, and not really unpleasant, but the sensation never fails to make me fully alert to what I am doing. This sensation has been really helpful for bringing my mind back to what I’m doing in the moment.
When dry brushing, I do my entire body to really get myself oriented to the present.
Some added benefits of dry brushing:
Detoxifies the skin by opening up pores and getting off dead skin cells
Increases blood flow and aids in lymphatic drainage
Stimulates your nervous system in the same way a massage does
Removes dead skin cells making your skin smoother and softer
Journaling
There are two ways in which journaling can be helpful for grounding yourself in reality. These ways are polar opposites.
The first way is journaling about things that ground you in the moment and your experiences in the present.
Some ways to journal in the present moment include:
Affirmations or matras
Writing intentions
Narrating what the rest of your day will look like
Writing out your weekly, monthly, yearly goals
The second way of journaling to ground yourself into reality is free journaling about your second reality. This technique I find helpful when I’m most close to losing touch with reality. This gives me an outlet to write and feel the things I’m feeling and thinking and allows me space to process it without engaging with the thoughts and other reality. Instead, I’m engaging with them indirectly through writing.
I set a timer to give myself a set amount of time to dabble in my other reality and then let all the feelings, emotions, and thoughts just flow. No matter what they are, I let them out.
Once the timer goes off, I’m done. Usually then, I will go back and do the first journaling part more focused on what I’m doing for the rest of the day or writing affirmations, goals, or intentions.
Connect with Your Pet
Connecting with your pet can be a great way to ground yourself in the present moment.
Remove all other distractions from your area, like phone or TV, and focus simply on connecting with your pet on a new level.
Feel the sensation of their fur (if they’re furry) against your hand and focus on it. Focus on how they are moving around. Focus on ways you can interact with and get to know them in a deeper connection.
Take your dog or pet for a walk outside. Two of my rabbits acted as emotional support animals to me and taking them on walks in a stroller helped me get out of my own head and focused on my present situation and circumstances.
If you have a dog or large animal, having them come up and lay on your chest or body can provide relief similar to deep pressure therapy. Placing their chin on your arm or leg can provide tactile stimulation as well. (These are tasks that some psychiatric service dogs are taught to preform that you could teach your dog too!)
The goal is to get out of your head and just be present with your pet!
Ice or Cold Water
One of the quickest ways I have found to bring myself back to being grounded in the present is submerging my body or parts of my body into something cold.
This could be in a number of ways depending on much grounding you need:
Take a cold shower
Use an ice roller on your face
Splash cold water on your face
Place an ice pack on your face or neck
Rub ice on your face and neck
Hold a piece of ice in your hand
Chew on ice
This is one of the tactics I use when I’m more deeply in my head and need a physical change to bring my body and mind back to the present.
Get Outside
Nature itself is one of the most effective grounding techniques that I have used. There is something about being outside that connects me to something deeper within myself and helps bring my focus back to the present moment and brings a level of enjoyment to my life.
Numerous studies have found that being in nature can have a direct impact on our well-being and happiness.
Some of these studies include:
Getting outside can be done in a multitude of different ways:
Going for a walk or run outside
Walking in the grass in bare feet
Gardening (connecting with dirt can be especially beneficial)
Taking a pet for a walk
Having a picnic outside
Meditation or Self-Hypnosis
Meditation is one of the ones I struggled the most with when I was just beginning. I think this one is a skill that has to be developed over time and not one that is instantaneous unless you have a good grasp on the help you are seeking through it.
When I first began meditation, it was impossible for me to do. Not only did my mind wander to absolutely everything, but I would also have panic attacks as I sat in silence trying to calm my thoughts. The experience was too overwhelming for me.
After doing some reading on the practice, I realized that meditation can be different for everyone. I started doing experiments with it to find ways in which I could handle the experience.
One of the ways I found to cope and grow was through listening to music while I was meditating. It gave my mind something to focus on and the music usually helped bring me into my center and helped me stay calm.
Some of my favorites, depending on the type of meditation you are focused on doing, is the use of trance music and sound healing bowls. I use trance music when I’m trying to get more focused and energized, healing sound bowls when I’m looking for calmness and inner peace. If you’ve never listened to trance music before, this is a great place to start: Above and Beyond Group Therapy. If you’ve never listened to healing sound bowls, this is a great Youtube channel to start with: Healing Vibrations
After almost a year of using music, I slowly began to incorporate periods of meditation with just silence into my practice too. Now, I practice almost completely in silence. I appreciate it took me a long time to get to this place though and you shouldn’t feel limited when trying to experiment with what may work best for you. Do what feels right.
I’m only going to briefly mention self-hypnosis because it’s not something I have learned to do personally but felt it was worth mentioning. The reason I don’t use it is that I’ve been unable to get myself into self-hypnosis, though I’m still trying to learn.
Hypnosis has powerful benefits and if you’re able to follow the leads on videos or recordings into self-hypnosis, you can experience some extremely helpful benefits from the practice. If you’re unsure where to start with self-hypnosis, try the app Riveri. Although it’s a paid app, there is a free trial available and I found the app to be extremely helpful when it came to self-hypnosis.
Workbooks
One of the ways I keep myself grounded when I’m feeling somewhat dissociated is by doing workbooks designed for therapy.
One of the ways they help me stay grounded is that I’m focused on the information and guidance in the book and not what is going on around me or inside of me.
I typically do 15 minutes of a workbook at a time so I’m not getting overwhelmed with information but am still getting enough to help keep my mind focused on the prompts and tasks. Depending on my level of dissociation, I may do shorter or longer periods of time.
If you’re looking for a trauma or dissociation related workbook, this one is pricey but was super helpful when it came to learning how to manage and live with my dissociation: Coping with Trauma Related Dissociation. Another great workbook, which I’m in the middle of completing is: DBT Skills Training Manual and the workbook that goes along with it: DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets. The second one is quite an investment and is a little complicated because you are training yourself, but so far it’s been a very useful book to teaching myself DBT Skills.
I prefer workbooks over just reading because it asks questions and includes writing down answers so I’m really prompted to think about the information and the questions and not just zone out while reading.
Conclusion..
Coping with dissociation and breaks in reality are some of the hardest symptoms we have to manage.
Although my techniques might not work for everyone, I encourage you to be open to trying out new ideas and giving each one a try if you haven’t. There are some ideas I’ve found along the way that I was positive wouldn’t work, but turned out to be some of the most useful skills for me to have when managing my dissociation or when I need to test reality.
Every person is different and we all require different things to find our equilibrium. If you have other helpful tips for and tricks for grounding yourself to reality, feel free to share in the comments below!
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