How to Cope with Dissociation

Dissociation is a very complex subject to discuss. Experiences and symptoms can vary widely between individuals and what each person individually needs to cope with dissociation can look drastically different.

Dissociation in its purest form isn’t even identifiable by the person experiencing it. This can sometimes be a traumatizing experience in itself.

The main forms of dissociation that I’m discussing here are the forms that are more widely recognized and experienced - derealization and depersonalization.

Derealization is the feeling of being detached, alienated from, or unfamiliar with your surroundings.

Depersonalization, often times happens with derealization, but on its own is the feeling of feeling detached or unfamiliar with your own body or mental processes.

Educate yourself with facts on dissociation

Dissociation primarily happens to an individual as a coping mechanism in response to a traumatic event(s).

There is a wide variety of symptom presentation in dissociation but a few common ones are:

• Spacing out or mind feeling blank

• Sense of the world not being real

• Feeling detached from your surroundings

• Feeling as though the world is distorted - noises are louder or softer, colors are brighter or duller, objects are smaller or larger

• Feeling physically or emotionally numb

• Having out of body experiences - observing yourself outside your body

• Feeling like you’re living in a dream world

It’s common for people to have trouble explaining their experiences. They often times feel they may be going “crazy.” Don’t let this fear stop you from explaining your experiences or getting the help you need.

As a side note, some of these experiences also occur in psychosis, but the biggest difference between dissociation and psychosis is during the experience, you are aware that it’s not real or something is not right. You have insight into your experiences.

Build a support team

Dissociation can be a scary and unsettling experience for most. Having people around you that can have compassion and are willing to listen to what you are going through can make an enormous difference in your experience and your ability to cope with dissociation.

• Therapist

• Psychiatrist

• Counselor

• Trusted family member or friend

• Community programs or supports

• Religious groups

Sometimes talking with a safe person during an episode can help break the fog of dissociation or dissociative symptoms. Dissociation usually happens when we are feeling scared or unsafe in a situation, connecting with someone who we identify with as safe and understanding can help break the barrier of a dissociative episode.

Grounding yourself

Grounding yourself is bringing your body and mind back to the present. It’s bringing you back from the dissociative state your fear based trauma response likely led you to.

• Splash cold water on your face or hold an ice cube in your hand

• Breathing exercises

• Take comfort in a pet

• Light a candle and breathe deeply

• Go for a walk outside

• Meditation

• Running

• Yoga session

• Use a fidget toy, squishy toys, or something textured to touch with your hands

• Skin brushing

• Cold shower

• Walking outside barefoot on the ground, known as earthing (this has proven health benefits!)

Use these techniques when the environment around you, or you yourself, begins to feel off or “different.” We can’t always identify when we are in a dissociative state but small clues can let us know that grounding techniques may be helpful.

Journaling

It’s easy to feel confused by our dissociation and why this is happening to us. Journaling can be a great way to connect with your inner self. The more work you do with your inner self, the better chance you’ll have of your body beginning to feel safe in the world without using dissociation as a defense mechanism.

Some ways journaling is most helpful:

• Learn to identify some of your triggers

• Track behaviors and experiences when dissociating to integrate later

• Help process and come to terms with difficult emotions, feelings, or experiences

• Track which grounding techniques have the best outcome for you

• Write down what parts of dissociation you need help with understanding

If you are feeling unsure or confused about your dissociative symptoms, what they are, what they mean, or how serious they are - I recommend starting with the the Dissociative Experiences Scale II (DES-II) linked here. Having an idea about how severe your symptoms may be can help decide what your next steps should be.

If you are currently struggling without a diagnosis, I recommend finding help with a mental health professional within the support team options discussed above. Having a diagnosis can go a long way in making sure you receive the treatment and support you need to manage these experiences.

Whether you are diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) or Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD), dissociation is an experience I wouldn’t wish on anyone. It impacts our ability to function and our ability to interact and socialize with others. It impacts our ability to connect with and feel understood by others. It impacts how well we remain attentive and focused in our jobs.

Although we may feel we have little control when experiencing dissociation, becoming more knowledgeable, understanding our symptoms better, and learning how to manage our symptoms will go a long way in helping to ensure we remain grounded, engaged, and functional in our every day lives.

Start small, try a new thing each episode, and know that this isn’t something you can figure out overnight. Be gentle and easy with yourself. Give yourself what you need to succeed in the long term.

But most of all, remember you can do this!

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